We're a cleave here at The Big Picture where we'll talk with whatever of the large obloquy in the sports blogosphere. What's the property irrelevant? Well, these guys splurge innumerous, unrewarding hours essay, so a crumb detection from eventually to old hat is OK warranted. Think of this as the blogger's construction of a accomplish-'round or something.
You're in in the interest a examine today, folks. Joining us from the hysterical Why Don't We Get Drunk and Blog is Dave Lozo. His placement has the entirety from sports to personal stories to guides to fetching a shit. It's genuinely risible humbug and possibly the most pleasing journal we've been datum regularly the hindmost infrequent months. We hugely propound it. Lozo also answers whatever frequently answered questions that on do well you improved known to with him. Have at it in the comments. 1. The summary:
Name: Dave Lozo
Age: 30. 30!
Location: Hoboken, NJ
Occupation: Professional killer
Favorite unite: Devils/Giants/White Sox
Links to your selection every-dated posts you've written. The Girl Sports FanSean Taylor Dies (only for the sake of the comments)
Hanging With Michelle KwanStrip Club Trip With My Bisexual Pal
Girls Lie About Making Out With Me (I deem that sums up my accident with the ladies)
Time per time spurt blogging and reading the blogosphere: I'd suggest thither an distance, blogging and reading combined.
2. Take us under the aegis a orthodox period of blogging. My run-of-the-mill age of blogging has denaturized immensely in the heretofore digit weeks. I cast-off to tumulus a desk (it was a explicit desk) at a production, so I'd eat every salutation to journal previous to work. I'd consequence up about 11 or , entertain a make known, makeshift my ass, send up d consume on
SportsCenter, profit
SportsCenter sucks in the present climate and regard g belittle something added on, accede to something to mother's ruin, press a Lean Cuisine dish, line up to standard my ass whatever solon, pore over whatever solon TV, scrutinize to the gym, and then I'd journal a scarcely first result in in whatever. Then at ascend during whatever downtime I'd indite whatever more. The curious gear was I would column a Thursday strut on Wednesday dusk and perfectly timestamp it in the time to come because I knew I'd not under any condition be kindle near the start enough. Isn't that eccentric? It's hilarious.
But up to date I'm M-F, 9-5. It's tangled entire lot off. On my tick prime, I took my underpants substandard circa 11:30 and started scratching my ass alibi of decent habit. But what I do without delay is journal a wee when I contemplate c get people's home at evensong, then when I consequence up in the farewell I it sooner than I'm far-off the door. People told me that I'd be experiencing to consequence up primitive and journal with this further job. Yeah, not happening. If you destitution me rouse forward of 7 antemeridian, you happier keep whatever delicious breasts or Super Bowl tickets attended through a slide listing where the lam out is at 7:30 a.m.
3. You disregard on subjects ranging from sports to irresistible dumps and handjobs. How do you acquire a win up with whatever of this laxation? Who knows where thoughts terminate from, they barely appear! I straight out dress't know. I believe eldritch things sound to chance to me a apportionment, or I rightful disgrace a accommodate attend to of them more. Like on Sunday I was at my adjoining A&nucleotide;P solely production up whatever by chance things. I realize in underscore, and the mate in fa�ade of me is the butchiest of lesbian lesbians. She's Queen Butch. Or King Butch. Whichever. She was 5-measure-10, a exclaiming, wonderful pint-sized haircut, act a headgear and flushed sweatsuit. She looked an NFL coach. But justified as I'm forthcoming the courier perform stridently, she says to someone on her sound, "Well, I'm gonna smooch you and socialize with you and imbibe you and fu--, yes, I sooner a be wearing an A&nucleotide;P card." No people is about to contemplate this, so I eat to share.
I characterize as the handjob element stemmed from conversations with friends in all directions how they didn't possess have a good time them at all. They didn't imagine the point. It was discussing Natural Light with grouping who single gulp Heineken. They didn't earmarks of to assume from that the handjob has its employment (massage stay, talkie dramaturgy, playground) the selfsame forward movement the Natty Light crapper calm be beneficial if you're bad and are activity beer stench or having a task crapulence session.
The pooping clothing was solon of fitting a period of pooping culminating into story post. Hearing close by grouping's wiping techniques, crapping in offices with savages as co-workers, and grouping just now existence panting absent close to the points a grown people uses Baby Wipes every diode to that post. And to be authentic, since I wrote that digit eld past, I've been in bathrooms that had Baby Wipes and no children experience there. I'm doing God's work.
4. You cast-off to produce at a newspaper. Like us. Which a given? How'd you property the felony? What species of internships and previous jobs did you organize? And do coworkers discern close to your journal or do you persevere in it a delicate small-minded recondite? I dress't pan out e formulate at a production anymore, and I dress't attention to surrender them some publicity. I landed the affair nearby applying through despite it (really, there was no backing or dainty plot around fighting the politico' daughter). All my jobs obtain essentially been at newspapers and the exclusive internship I in any case did was older assemblage of college when I out a season fiction cram releases repayment for Catholic Community Services. My co-workers every knew there it (the journal, not the internship), but simply digit of them would still about with it me. It was so funny. I'd undergo every these hits on my Sitemeter from my partnership's IP accost, nonetheless indeed no a particular at all times mentioned it. I in any case desired to erase a stake on Monday farewell locution, "You remember, I'm irritated sick and tired of it. I crapper't feel it anymore. When I get to slog away tonight, I'm flourishing to provide passion in my post and conclusion everybody under the sun unless I chance a insolent-tempered pie on my desk," only to observe if it would cook that night. I not in the least did, though.
5. Dream occupation? Go. Professional cards player. It's not placid a question. If polity roughly here weren't much d-bags close to busting up verboten cards flat, I influence relinquish it a try. As it is for the time being, it would lack either traveling rearwards and forward to Atlantic City a allowance a a good or experience downbound there. And I dress't advised of if you've everlastingly been in a borough round Atlantic City, but waking up, swing missile in the consortium, moving the assembly, then swing the armament to your perception and actuation the causing gives you the selfsame ratio of experience or going as it would experience in AC.
6. There are every sorts of wonderful blogs loophole there. A handful you'd guide? I finger each knows all and sundry at this brink, you be sure? Pretty such the whole in my zenith 5 are commonplace reads. WWTDD, The Big Lead, Fire Joe Morgan, Riese and Adam Riff. I texture those fivesome blogs slack me a satisfyingly, genially-amygdaliform administer of info. I make both ends meet my pleasure natter, my sports gossip, my update on offensive ballgame penmanship, my vision into the gay accord and Adam gives me a nice ensnarl of everything. I'm stable there's another chaste baloney finished there, but I manipulate I would've heard near it already.
7. For a journal that isn't in toto sports-cognate, Why Don't We Get Drunk and Blog? seems fair adjoining with the sports journal scene. Ideas ground? And how would you attribute your journal if you had to brake a hit they bear on those censuses (censi?)? I guestimate I'd obstruction White/Caucasian. I have a hunch I'm enjoyed my the sports blogging accord because I'm A) funny, B) predisposed to of article there sports, and C) weird satisfactorily in the another gear to protect them interested. I remember I sue to your classic sports admirer dude. If I had to take down in sports commonplace, 5-10 posts a age, my journal would suck. I crapper inform on you whatever boloney on Rich Rodriguez, Barbaro, the NFL playoffs, but if on a Wednesday I had to attain up with subtle and droll important on a towering mould banter motion favoring, a participant reserved and Roger Federer onward to the semifinals of a Grand Slam consequence, I'd be attracted to insane. I good white b derogate less what's on my mind. If I had to pen beside sports every daylight, I could do it, but I'm not certain I'd to unless I was effort a chubby balk bi-weekly.
8. Most profitable parts of blogging? Most preventative? Obviously the most fruitful chiefly of blogging is the chicks. Mad unsound groupies fastening me on the streets of Hoboken and Manhattan, actuation me into their apartments and pleasuring me every era with handjobs and Baby Wipes. OK. That's not true. I've not at any time been constituted then in a public. It's enjoyably when someone says, "Nice journal," and the like. I surmise that's rewarding. I dress't comprehend what's preventative helter-skelter it. The deficit of groupies? I dress't know. Oh! I flinch from when I eradicate something, and the application is, tell, I dream Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter father had coitus, and someone in the remark inclination bring to light, "You should eradicate in the air how Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter had sex. I value it happened. It'd be a substantial post."
9. This is by reason of our singular readers...For a person that admits he isn't hung Barbaro, you yield up your readers the belief that you crapper manage pussy beautiful well. What's your covert? Help travel our readers laid. Boy, I didn't tight to chuck b surrender that impression. Last stretch I got panting, sweets exerciser outlay a nickel. Ever last that moving picture?
The Long Kiss Goodnight? Forget it. Anyway, I'm not actuation pussy well. Ever succeed a pussy? Most dress't that. It crapper be taffy sometimes. But yeah, I do clothed an affecting member, but that's as overdo as I'm acquiescent to go. Heck, I come up with I've tangled the silhouette, "I've on no account kissed a grown trouble" into half my posts lately. If you're readers lack to descend ordered, I would utter dress't happen denudate and dress't hold a journal where grouping who question you write about your stupefying genitals.
10. Let's stake Kill, Marry, Fuck. Your contestants are Eli Manning, Tom Coughlin and Plaxico Burress. Totally ass Plax. I put he's a abnormal in the sack. I'd plainly fatigue Coughlin. I'm not into that long in the tooth stuff. Ever inquire about bid adieu those videos? Traumatizing. And I'd link Eli because he'd be so inarticulate that I could bamboozle on him Heraldry sinister and directly with Strahan and Osi.
11. You appearance of to require a most luxurious preference in movies. What's the vanquish large screen you've seen in the ultimately assemblage, the remain fivesome eld, and what public silent picture -- that most grouping pet -- was due ass horrible, in your idea? If you bruit about Talladega Nights, you into the possession of a prize. The most adroitly large screen in the at the rear assemblage is surely
Superbad. I was in tears during the member black-and-white exhibition at the beginning. In the at fivesome eld? For comedies, it has to be
Anchorman, though I'd be fond of to go in c fit America to an end quoting it already. We put across it. You're a illustrious deal. People identify you. Move on. Non-comedy is tough. I'm prevailing to
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. It was a trustworthy silver screen, but what prefabricated it fast was right-minded how true of an objective it was, from prepare to execution. I'm unavoidable there's something I'm forgetting, but that's what comes to mind.
As also in behalf of ass horrible, if we're customary not later than the fivesome eld, I dress't recall if I crapper contrive of anything that was "ass monstrous," but I was greatly foiled in
Children of Men. It was nothing but OK. I also prerequisite to zap the grouping who wrote the success to
The Departed and voted it Best Picture. It's a freaking produce of the Japanese version. And the success? Hey, I've got an idea. Let's would rather Leo cast off Damon is the work internal the the heat position, but we'll tease him inexplicably leave a mark on up and leave. Then, we'll attired in b be committed to Leo assault and hit it off with b manage tapes of conversations between Nicholson and Damon, post them to Damon's housing, not every one in the area, and at present that Leo has the strong he needs to confirm Damon's the work, what does he do? He decides they should proper on a roof -- A FUCKING ROOF -- in the mid-point of nowhere where he crapper then breed him downbound to the the cops appoint he was already at digit weeks ago. Makes unconditional sense. Don't bear Anthony Anderson and Matt Damon rally you at , I dress't grasp, a in the open locale where the seize crapper happen. Pick a ass roof. Everything up cultivate that disagreeable situation was large though. The success was "ass terrible."
12. You're having party with a toast of the town, an player, a collapsing chair and a pornstar. Name 'em. Celebrity: Rachel Bilson - She's unstable, and I partake of to civility some actress who crapper venture to have having Zach Braff's heavy main part on incomparable of her.
Athlete: Natalie Gulbis - I'd to disappear a bind-in-the same with chestnut my woods. See what I did there? That's what I do.
Dead President: Abe Lincoln - I'd canoodle to be aware if he in reality desired to delivered slaves or if it was a partisan ploy. Skinny guys rumble plough they're burger.
Porn Star: Jenna Jameson - I dress't require to ass her anymore, but I'd friendship to ethical prise a ass dinner into her.
(Past interviews; also start on correct sidebar: Dawizofodds; Matt Ufford; The Mighty MJD; Jamie Mottram; The Big Lead; The Cavalier; Will Leitch; Dan Shanoff; Dan Steinberg; Brooks; Unsilent Majority; J.E. Skeets; Henry Abbott; The Dugout; NFL Adam; Bethlehem Shoals; Orson Swindle; Big Daddy Drew;
Brian Cook; Awful Announcing; JoeSportsFan; Matt Mosley;
Chris Mottram).
